Unencumbered

I have tired of being broken, of pointing out cracks either healed, or readily so by the Cross of Christ, the Word of God, and the unguent of the Holy Spirit. Entering back into fellowship comes with its tricks, standing, as I have, on this side of it for too long.

There were moments where I wondered if it was a fairy tale. The facts presented are pretty fantastic.

At the end of the day, I have to respond to the jump of my heart within me when God's word is presented. When I see Christ in the things around me. The undeniable goodness of God's hand in my life. I have been forged this way, be it wrong, or be it right. It is who I am. It is what I must claim as truth. I have no choice but to do any other thing, to respond when it is spoken.

What cost the Cross? What desires do I have that trump the goodness of life in Christ? My own selfishness would draw lines in the sand, holding out its hand, "You can't do this! Or THAT! What about that? Won't you be robbed?"

For which one of these things, all temporary, all counterfeit, would I offer up the peace of my heart? They are weights, these things from which we've been given freedom. As Paul stated, "All things are legal for me, not all things are expedient." The Cross gives me the opportunity to be who I truly am, who I was created to be, unencumbered by the distractions, the pull and press of my flesh.

How can I be robbed when the hand that provides me is the manifest goodness of the Creator?

The sin I commit is largely perpetrated against my self, robbing me of the fullness of God. Why would I live a life in the darkness of shadow? Why should my life be a portion of what is possible? What reason is there to live in a piece when I can have the whole?

And to know--to KNOW--what is possible, to have eaten and tasted and known the Good of Life in Christ? What question is there for me? What keeps my feet from running, arms held wide, into the arms of the One I love the most?

Indeed, my hand burns from being smacked, but now I am the only one holding it back. The fear in my life--of trusting, primarily--is a thing I choose to hang on to, to call my own. There is freedom from this fear. I can set it down more readily than it gripped me.

I have also found the opinions of others to be the bricks of the prison I have constructed around myself. "What will they think? Will I lose my relationships?" Some may be lost, sadly. However, for most of my life I have walked as a Christian and had friends who didn't share the path with me. Real relationship with God draws others to Him. They know me, and that knowledge should make them okay. If not, I can't give up my joy for other's opinions. I hadn't before. Why should I now?

Walking in can be tricky. God's goodness though, I see it flashing around me, His hand at work.

What can my response be His goodness? To wallow in the backwater of my soul?

No. By His grace--no.